


it's hard to breathe sometimes

by gingergenower



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Feels, M/M, post 3x03, the softest of boyfriends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2019-04-18 22:27:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14223135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gingergenower/pseuds/gingergenower
Summary: Alec's dad calls.





	it's hard to breathe sometimes

**Author's Note:**

> title taken from Ruelle's [Carry You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-rKwPblSdQA)

Eyes flicking to Alec, Magnus watches him set his wine glass down and answer his buzzing phone from the other end of the couch. The apartment’s quiet with the gentle lull of music humming in the background, but Alec stands to turn it off, tilting at an angle from Magnus to avoid his gaze.

‘Hey, dad. Yeah, she… yes, she did.’ Tense lines of his shoulders hunched over as he rubs his face, Alec suddenly seems exhausted. ‘She said.’

What the Clave are doing to Maryse sets a dangerous precedent for what they might do in the future; it hasn’t escaped Magnus and it doesn’t seem to have escaped Alec that the Clave’s fondness for scapegoating leaves justice to die, but all it’s doing at the moment is hurting.

‘Jace and Izzy don’t know yet. She asked me to let her tell them herself.’ There’s a long pause, and something shifts in Alec’s face, eyes narrowing, jaw tight. ‘I don’t care, dad.’

Magnus sits up, setting his own half-finished glass down. They had been sharing the wine Maryse brought.

‘ _I don’t care_. This isn’t about that-’ Alec’s cut off and he listens, but he looks like he wants to punch something. ‘This is about you letting them de-rune and exile her, this is about you leaving her to the Clave, after everything I would’ve thought you’d _do_ something-’

Magnus flinches at the anger, the desperation, the despair in Alec’s voice.

He lets his father talk, but his eyes are bright and vicious. ‘You should’ve fought for her.’ Hanging up, he slams the phone on the coffee table and sits back down, head in his hands.

Magnus soothes a hand up his arm, moving in closer, and Alec’s shaking under his touch. ‘Alexander.’

‘She’s our _mom_. They raised us together.’

‘I know.’

‘I don’t understand how he did nothing, he should’ve done something-’

Taking hold of his arm, guiding Alec into his arms, Magnus hugs him. After a few seconds, Alec breathes out, burying his face in Magnus’ neck and hugging him back, steadying himself.

‘Your father didn’t decide this; the Clave did.’ Magnus kisses his hair. ‘And maybe he had nothing to fight with.’

‘I would have done something.’

‘I know.’

It’s fraught and difficult and complicated now the decision’s been made, but if Alec had known, there’s nothing he wouldn’t have done.

‘I don’t know what your father could or could not have done, but you’re not going to lose her, Alec.’ Magnus pulls back, cupping Alec’s cheek. ‘She’s still here. She still loves you. That won’t change.’

There’s so much unsaid, hours in a second, and Alec nods, eyes closing as he leans into Magnus’ hand.

‘You need sleep.’

‘Ok.’

Magnus stands first, holding his hand out to Alec, and he leads him to the bedroom. He doesn’t like it when Alec sleeps at the Institute now- he doesn’t know when Alec went to bed, if he went at all, and he doesn’t know if anyone makes sure he eats breakfast before he’s distracted by work. There’s so little Magnus can protect him from, but he can at least do this. 

He can be here.

**Author's Note:**

> this is 100th story and I didn't even realise :P hell yeah!


End file.
